Nursing Homes, the good and the bad

With my mother being in Nursing Homes since 2003, I have already seen the good and the bad. After seeing the two different kinds, they are almost easy to notice which one is which. Unfortunately, My mother had a bad experience in a Nursing Home. She was sexually assaulted by both a staff member and patient, she has had her face bashed in by another patient, she was always unclean and had a scabbies case that continued to be untreated. Also, I was not power of attorney, so I had no ability to remove her. So I started contacting the police, and unfortunately it took them dehydrating my mother and her being hospitalized before she was moved to a better home closed to me. My mother weighed a whopping 75-85 lbs. Now over 2years later she is 110-115, big improvement.

Now, after saying all this I started comparing the signs from the bad to the good. An important thing always visit the nursing home before admitting the patient there, if you can!

Some homes you will walk in and it will take your breath away how beautiful it is, don't get your hopes up-look to see if the staff, the upkeep, and the smell starts declining. Some patients get put in a locked down area, the ones that do not want to be there and try to get out and the ones that wander around but dont know who or where they are. If in a locked area the good ones are where the patients have room to walk and are supervised by staff, if there is noone around to watch them, then it's a bad sign. If the rooms are seperated from the dining/rec room , be careful! Bad signs are when the staff let the patient roam the rooms when there is no one to watch. Thats when assaults happen. The staff want to sit in the TV room while the other patients are in hallway wandering in and out of rooms. Yes, staff members are suppose to keep an eye out on the hallway to see who goes in what room, but they don't always. My mom is proof of that! Another sign, is if they tell you it's always good to call and let us know you're coming, BULL! It is always best to be unexpected, unless you are planning to take the patient out. Look to see cheerful Staff members, they greet you with a smile. If you are at a home, where staff look miserable, yawning, and gossiping with other staff;be careful. These people went to school for this work, they are suppose to love their field of work. If they don't like their job, then guess how they feel about your loved ones!! If you notice something about a patient and they don't take concern, BIG PROBLEM!! Sick and Elderly have weak immune systems when something looks wrong, it normally is! Also depending on how ill the patient is they will have Care Plan Meetings with the family, normally every 3 months, or every month if health is declining. Go to these meeting, ask questions, if you don't have meetings like this then ask about it. Also, if there is a nurse or CNA you feel uncomfortable with, say something! The home doesn't know it unless they are informed. The Staff should always make you feel warm and welcomed, ALWAYS!!! Last but not least if you feel like somethings bad, go with your gut! This is your loved ones life, make it the best for them, until the end!!